First let me say thank you for all the prayers and secondly I would just like to share two major obstacles I have learned to face…the first, I am not in control of Hannah’s health….it is not going to become better or worse by my angst, my fear or my obsessive compulsions. The second, my daughter is a medical anomaly….she has never and will never fit into a ‘protocol book’ or do as others have in the past….she is paving her own way through cancer and my fears are based off of past patients prognoses instead of waiting to see what Hannah does. These lessons/realizations came to me yesterday through a monumental amount of channels.
The quick snap shot of what we are facing is this….For every action, there is a reaction. For all the chemo that I have agreed to allow treat Hannah, there is an exponentially high chance that it can cause side effects similar or even worse than the initial intention of the medication. All this being said, not only are we watching for kidney function and scans for no tumors, we now have to watch her blood for secondary forms of cancer.
Hannah’s blood tests were abnormal two weeks ago and yesterday we had them retested. The results of yesterday, should they have gone down could have led us quickly to a leukemia scare. If her blood work went up, we would find out that Hannah is just doing this on ‘her time’. The results indicated that some went up, some stayed the same and some went down…..thus not truly giving us an answer, except let’s watch and recheck in two weeks.
I wish I could nod my head and gain a definitive answer, but that’s not how this life and God works. Hannah has NEVER done anything in the medical field as they would have expected her to do. Her kidney cancer has some of the best prognosis statistics in pediatric cancer, but Hannah is teaching them not to let their guards down because she’s here on this earth to shake some things up!
Some hope for their child to be a star athlete, or the class valedictorian….my child is choosing to challenge the pediatric cancer world as part of her legacy. As much as this has caused me and others great pain, what a blessing I have to say, my three time survivor is still throwing curve balls and keeping these amazing medical professionals on their toes!
To our team, our friends, our prayer warriors and my family hang on tight….she’s in to give us all a good ride! Thanks for being willing to ride our storm out with us!